“The Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” (Genesis 2:18).
And He did. He made Eve for Adam and the story takes off from there. What was God thinking bringing 2 flawed individuals together who have different pasts, different personalities, past injuries, survival and defense mechanisms and different attachment styles. Really God?
Oh yes! God created us for attachment and thus made us to NEED this from each other and mostly from our primary relationship, our marriage partner. This is where it can get tricky. Attachment is not physical intimacy. Attachment is way deeper and serves often as a platform for the quality of sexual intimacy and caretaking of each other.
“Science says romantic love is not a strange mixture of sex and sentiment. It’s an ancient, wired-in survival code. It’s wired into our genes, it’s wired into every neuron in our brain, it is in our bones and it’s wired in. It protects us, it’s wired-in survival code that is designed to keep people we depend on close to us”…. Sue Johnson
Let’s learn more..please click at videos linked below.
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What is Attachment? And, how does it apply to adults?
Emotionally Focused Therapy is founded on Attachment Theory and proved the essentials and basic human needs in relationships.
One of the hardest things in life is to feel like you are alone in a committed relationship.
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Emotionally focused Therapy
EFT is best known model used in couples therapy, as a cutting edge, tested and proven couple intervention that is the gold standard for empirically validated intervention in this field.
EFT model has expanded to the fields of individual therapy (EFIT) and family therapy (EFFT) demonstrating the research and studies providing efficacy and maintain long-term results after therapy is completed.
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Can you repair your marriage after an affair?
Affairs are attachment traumas that usually creates significant breach of trust and security in the relationship. Often in these cases the feelings are overwhelming and hard to navigate as both parties carry a lot of pain and often these emotions show up in a cycle of conflict.
This type of attachment trauma requires a special kind of treatment where both parties can be grounded in understanding his/her attachnment needs and what happens in an attachnent injury. Not all marriages can survive after an affair and accepting that may also be part of therapy.
Emotionally Focused Therapy has been known to rebuild that trust and security again..and again..and again.